Ehrm, okay. So I've finally decided to just stay here until I finish my AAT course. Then just work sa 'Pinas. Kasi once na I'm done na siguro naman my parents would let me decide na for my own, diba? Eeew. Ewan. Haha.
I hate my parents. I don't know, I just really really well fine, DESPISE them. Hayay. Nakiki-ride na lang ako minsan. Or maybe I'm just being too rebellious or something. Ay ewan. Basta, ayun na 'yun.
Can't wait to have a job kahit na hindi man lang ako nag-aapply. Toink. Pero this summer talaga and by the time I get home, I'd search the internet for jobs. :) At I'll download a SAGE software din hopefully, makakita talaga ako. Shhit.
Since, fresh start again. Few things to share lang.
I am so busted. I haven't been to skuul this week. I always ditch skuul. Stupid ass. Haha. Eh kasi naman hindi ako magising ng maaga eh. So not motivated talaga and I admit as well that I am irresponsible but got good grades though. These are the only things I got to think about: Unit 21 Simulation Exam which I don't know when kasi haven't been to skuul nga but I guess it would be next next week. I know I could pass this naman kahit papano kasi I've been efficient in using the Sage software. Portfolio/Student Record this would be easy lang, I mean not really, but filling up lang naman eh and I'd ask help from my teacher. Hala, un lang pala. Hahahaha. :D
Insecurities. I hate this feeling. As in, I'd rather just die. Haha. O.A. Fine, insecure ako sa ibang tao. As in insecure talaga. And I guess, sharing it here helps din para alisin 'yun sa kata-katawan ko. Ang hirap kasi for me to accept things eh which really makes me sooo depressed at times talaga. So ittry ko talaga. Para less hassle.
I don't want to think about US anymore. Fine, we're okay and I guess, we're better off not being committed or something. But what's the deal with us, anyway? We act like we still are together without the I LOVE YOU's nga lang. We just got tired of saying those words siguro since we cannot put them to actions naman, since we cannot be together. I HATE MYSELF FOR BEING THIS WAY. Alam mo 'yung tipong, I always make habol sa'yo? I'm not mapakali kapag nagtetext ka na na kailangan I've got to text back agad. Na I always want to call you kahit na ayaw mo naman. Na I act this way pero ikaw hindi, like fine you're tired I understand that pero would you not want to talk to me too if ever? I mean, ako I know I would want to kahit na soooobrang pagod pa ako or even if I haven't slept yet or something. Siguro nga I should learn to love myself first. 'Yung ako muna talaga. And with the distance talaga mahirap and you're gonna be sooo busy with law school din so I won't asa muna diba? Somehow na-feel ko na din na there would be less communication na naman. BUT I'm kuul with that. Cos I should learn to somehow let go of you ng konti konti.
Hala, 'yun lang. :D Just so you know my little diary that I'd share this link with my very bitchy bestfriend. Or maybe I've got to think about that. Haha, that bitch.
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