you had me suicidal when you say it's over..

OCTOBER 29, 2006

There are times when I can't get hold of myself anymore because of too much problems, too much thinking and then depression and paranoia just come next.

But I never ever thought of comitting suicide.

Well yeah, one time when I was in 3rd year highschool but it wasn't that serious though. I just kind of got in some trouble at school and I didn't have anyone to talk to and I felt that I've failed a lot of people especially myself. I planned to jump off our terrace which wasn't even that high. And it makes me laugh thinking about it right now.

Problems really make a person crazy.

So yeah, maybe I would be lying if I have had never considered suicide as an option ever. But that was just one time. I can't imagine myself slitting my wrists; I wouldn't be able to take hurting myself.

Yes, I understand those people who do it but find it really absurd though for they aren't solving their problems they just infact make it worst. You won't feel better after slitting your wrists, drinking some pills or whatever, you're putting your life at risk as well as those people who love you. Then again, I can't blame them for people have different ways of handling their problems.

And apparently, suicide for them is the only easy way out. They are the people that I consider as cowards.

I'm not mocking them or anything, I'm just saying my opinion.

And because maybe, MAYBE, at one point in my life, I might consider it not just an option.

Oh my, why did I even write this post before? HAHAHA. Of course, I do remember why because of this someone. Hmm, let me recall who that is. HAHAHA. And mind you, it did cross my mind. Not just cross ahhh. HAHA! 2007 was a crappy year for me. And I guess 2008 would be one to. It kind of already is, actually. Heartaches every year.. Well, how about that huh? ;) ;) ;)

P.S. Such a hyppppoooocrite.. :D :D BE happpyyy!